


Daylight

by Ayakox



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-28
Updated: 2017-06-29
Packaged: 2018-11-20 13:35:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11336559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ayakox/pseuds/Ayakox
Summary: Raphael is falling in love. But he's a vampire and she's the most beautiful creature in this world. He doesn't deserve her and he can't stand to watch her die.He has to leave her, no matter how painful it can be.





	1. You deserve better

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! :) I'm an italian girl who just found out the magical world of Shadowhunters. This is my first time ever writing in English, so there could be some mistakes! I really hope it will still be understandable and that you can enjoy it anyway! In case of mistakes please let me know so I can learn something more and improve ^_^ ♥

Night was about to end and Raphael had to come back to the Hotel DuMort. Sunrise would have come in a couple of hours and it would have been better to him to be safe in the darkness of his room.

 

It had been a nice evening. He went out just to feel the breeze on his skin. He could no longer feel cold or hot, but it was nice to feel fresh air touching his face. He was randomly walking to the streets when something caught his attention. It was a figure on the opposite side of the street. A woman with long black hair and red lips. Isabelle. Even if he wasn't a vampire -which guaranteed him a perfect view- he would have recognized her. He would have recognized her everywhere.

 

He had spent a long time looking her face, her hair, her eyes. He missed her so much and he did think about her a lot of times. They met a few times and, everytime, they talked like good friends without mention their past. She never asked him to bite her again and he never tried to tempt her. He often found himself thirsty for her blood since when they stopped seeing each other but he always resisted the impulse to bite her. Her blood was sweet and warm and it was like pure energy in his veins. It was the most delicious thing he had ever drunk and it was really hard to not think about it. But he had to be strong. He knew how dangerous addictions were and he didn't want Isabelle to suffer again. Not because of him. She was incredibly strong and beautiful and she did manage to fight her addiction with her own energies. Raphael couldn't have ever destroyed all her efforts for pure selfishness, no matter how thirsty he could have been.

 

For this reason it was painful to see her. She did awake his thirst and he had to fight against his own nature to keep her safe. He did hate the idea to be a danger to her. More than this, though, he did hate the way she was used to talk to him. She smiled all the time and she looked him in his eyes without esitation or disgust. She seemed so happy and peaceful that he couldn't help but feel a twinge at his chest. Why did she was so radiant when she looked at him? Why didn't she hate him for what he did to her? Raphael could not understand. Plus, the more she smiled, the more she was beautiful and the more she was beautiful, the more he wanted to touch her. To touch her cheek, her hair, her lips. But he couldn't. He didn't have to. If he had touched her just once he knew he could have not resisted to her. Her scent, her warmth. And if he couldn't resist her scent, how could he resist her blood? It was too dangerous, too risky. This is why he usually didn't meet her. When he saw Isabelle for the streets he simply went away to not let her to see him. He did hide to watch her secretly and caress the idea to touch her skin once again. But it wasn't always possible. Sometimes she saw him first and he couldn't go away. Sometimes he had to face her and respond to her kindness with a certain quantity of selfcontrol. Like that night happened.

 

Isabelle saw him before he could do anything else and she just shined like she had seen the thing she was waiting the most in the entire world. Raphael felt his heart winced even though his heart didn't move for years. He swallowed silently and saw her coming. She was beautiful. She wore a black sleeveless top which left him see the white scars of the runes on her skin and a pair of black leather pants. Those pants showed the shape of her legs, of her hips making really difficult to concentrate. Her hair waved behind her at every step while the moon lit up her face. Raphael tried to focus his attention on the sound of her boots heels in order to not think about the thirst that was burning his throat.

 

-Raphael!- she said once she reached him. -What are you doing here? It's almost dawn– she asked, happily, smiling at him. Lights and shadows danced on her face in a wonderful color game.

 

-Isabelle- he greeted her with a slight nod of the head, his lips contracted in a courteus smile. -I was just about to coming back to the Dumort. My day is almost over- the vampire said with a bitter tone of voice, his eyes rolled up to the moon for a second before to come back on Isabelle's face.

 

She nodded with a slight of guilt in her eyes. -I see.-

 

No one said anything while Raphael was trying to hold himself to stretch one hand toward her cheek. He would have wanted to say how beautiful she was that night, he would have wanted to say how much he would have desired to raise up her chin with his fingers, just to look straight into her eyes. But he couldn't. So he just stayed silent preventing himself from feeling her perfume, the scent of her blood.

 

-Listen... I know that the thing we had was quite... weird and wrong and toxic to our wellness, but...- Isabelle said stammering, biting her low lip a couple of times before continue. -...I miss you. I miss our nights, Raphael.- she admitted looking up at his eyes with the most defenseless and honest expression she ever had. -I'm not talking about the sex and the venom and the blood- Just hear that word made Raphael wince. -I'm talking about us. Our talks, the dinners you made me, the walks...- She looked so vulnerable while she was talking that Raphael almost couldn't look at her. He could have hurted her so easily... But now, in that exact moment, _she_ was hurting him. -I miss you- she repeated in a low voice, almost a whisper in the darkness of that night.

 

Raphael felt his heart break into pieces.

 

He saw her hand try to touch his. Her fingers was slow, shy, almost she was afraid he didn't want the same thing. If just Raphael could have told her how much he would have wanted to touch her too! But he couldn't do this, he couldn't throw all his efforts for a tiny, little moment of weakness. So he just clenched his lips and got a step behind, moving his hand far from hers. That was the most difficult thing he had ever done and it costed him a great deal of effort.

 

Isabelle istantly stiffened swallowing silently. Her eyes got darker, pain shone in them while her lips just trembled, disappointed.

 

-We can't, Isabelle- Raphael's voice was firm, sure, without esitation. His hands were tight along the hips, the knuckles were white from the strenght of his grip. -You know we can't.-

 

-Why?- she promptly asked. -I don't want your venom, I swear! I won't ask you to bite me ever again, you can trust me Raphael! It's not about this- Her voice was like a pleading, he could perfectly hear the honesty in that sound. He didn't think she wanted to start over again that dangerous relationship they had.

 

-You don't know, Isabelle!- the vampire blurted, out loud. - _Now_ you're saying this, but what could happen if we should stay together? On the couch where I drank your blood or in the kitchen where I've bitten your wrist?- he asked seriously, almost desperatly, clenching his teeth. -It's easy to evoid a temptation when it is far away from us, but it is all another story when it is always around us. It is a need we can't just ignore.- His voice lowered slowly while he was closing his eyes. He sighed tiredly licking his lips very fastly. - _I_ can't ignore it.- he admitted, at last, lowering his head.

 

-Raphael...- Isabelle's voice was nothing more than a whisper. She looked at him like a mother could look at a dying son. Her eyes were big, full of held tears. She went a step further, closest to him. Raphael didn't move, this time, tired. He opened his eyes looking at her with a silent pray in his expression.

 

-Isabelle... please-

 

-I trust you, Raphael. I have faith in you- she said. Close, so close it was impossible to not feel her scent. So close he could feel her breaths on his skin. A shiver climbing his back till his nape. -You won't hurt me-

 

-But you're hurting me.-

 

He looked into her eyes, the breeze blew fresh and gentle on them, messing up her hair. She was even more beautiful than before. Her neck was completely open and he could see the perfect point to bite, just under her jaw. Isabelle stared him confused, her lips parted.

 

-Everytime you're so close to me I can't stop thinking how much I'd like to touch you, Isabelle. How much I'd like to move your hair to see the skin of your neck, of your shoulders.- His hand, just as it was some sort of demonstration, went to her face. His fingers slipped into her hair, moving them behind her ear. He looked at her neck, at the runes drawn on her body. Raphael left slip his fingers on her skin in a straight line from the ear to the shoulder. His touch was gentle, soft, it made her shudder. -I can't stop thinking how sweet was your blood. How warm were your kisses. And it hurts, Isabelle. It is an open wound- His voice was low, a confession of guilt. He didn't want to hurt her, he didn't want to be cruel, but he did need to be honest. He did need that Isabelle understood his feelings. For his sake. And hers.

 

The Shadowhunter looked at him gasping. She missed the feeling of his hands on her. She didn't move, didn't say anything while Raphael was talking to her. She just stared at him abducted, stunned, feeling a deep pain in her heart. -You're strong, Raphael. Stronger than you think. I'm sure you won't fall if just...-

 

Raphael withdrew his hand shaking his head.

 

-Why? Why should I take such a risk, Isabelle?- he asked astonished. -Why can't you just think that it is wrong? That we can't?- For the first time his voice wasn't so firm, so sure. It sounded like a complaint, as if he was just tired of that discussion.

 

-Because... I lo-... -

 

Suddenly, in a second, Raphael's forefinger pressed on Isabelle's lips. -No. Don't say it.- His voice was hard, this time. Tough. -Don't.- he repeated looking in her eyes.

 

The vampire could feel Isabelle's lips tremble under his finger. He could see her eyes full of tears. She didn't say anything and yet her lips moved to compose some silent words.

 

-Can't you understand how impossible it is, Isabelle?- he asked in low voice, the pain in his chest getting stronger minute by minute. -I'm a vampire. You're a Shadowhunter. I won't die, I won't grow old. I will watch you getting older and older and older. I will always appear like that and I won't grow old with you. I will see you die and I will carry that pain in my heart forever- A sparkle of true pain shone in his eyes while his voice began to tremble. -And for me “forever” has no limits.- he showed her the bitterest smile. -I won't give you children. I'm dead, I can't have any. I might be the man who will end the name of Lightwoods.- If he would have taken Isabelle as his partner no one could have continued their discent. Alec was gay and he was in love with a warlock and Max died before he could even have some interests in women. -This is not what you want. You deserve better-

 

He left his finger slip away from her lips. The look in his eyes was sad, distant and full of pain. However Isabelle was not a common girl. She rarely cried and she almost never showed her weaknesses to anyone. She was a real force of the nature and no one could tell her what to do. Not even Raphael.

 

-What do you know about what I want? What I deserve?- she said fiercely. Every sign of weakness disappeared from her face while she was looking at him head high. -This is not a choice you can make for me. It is my decision to take.- She was firm in her words, no traces of doubt in her big dark eyes. -I don't care if I won't have children. I don't care if I'm the last Lightwood on my genealogical tree. I surely want to make my family proud, but not at the cost of my own happiness.-

 

Raphael knew he was going to give in. Isabelle wanted him. Isabelle basically said he made her happy. She would have thrown the name of her family away just to stay with him. And there were nothing in the world that he could desire more. But this was a selfish thought. He couldn't let her do this. He had to take care of her... to protect her. In order to do this he surely couldn't let her share her life with a damned soul. She had to live in the sun, he belonged to the night. They were from different worlds.

 

-But I do care of _my_ happiness- he said touching his own chest. -I don't want to share my life with a mortal soul. I will always carry the memory of my family in my heart because I couldn't choose not to care about them- He felt his heart crushing, those words were like poison between his lips. -But I can chose to get away from you.-

 

Isabelle just stared at him astonished. Her eyes got bigger and just one tear fell down on her cheek. Her lips parted and Raphael could see the pain burning in her irises. She didn't say a word, she just froze in an eternal moment of sorrow. Raphael couldn't stand to see her that way anymore.

 

-So... goodbye Isabelle.- he said before turning back and walking away into the night.

 


	2. His way to love him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Raphael and Isabelle were talking, Alec and Magnus were leaving the pub where they had spent part of their night.  
> A little quarrel bring the two of them to talk about their feelings.

The two guys left the pub for a few minutes and no one said a word for all the way back to the Institute.

 

They were a really bizzarre couple. One of them was tall and basically normal, wearing a black shirt and a pair of blue jeans. The other one was shorter and a mess of colors. He wore an electric blue sequin jacket over a burgundy shirt. A pair of necklaces hung on his chest while his hands were full of rings. His pants were tight and black as his boots were. They came to the knee, full of buckles and hinges. The stranger thing, though, wasn't his outfit but the make up he had on his face: his eyes were shining thanks to a generous quantity of glitter all around them. He wasn't feminine at all, if you were wondering. He was incredibly attractive and quite handsome. Maybe thanks to his large shoulders, or maybe because he knew how to take advantage of his appearance.

 

-Won't you talk to me anymore, today?- the shorter guy asked, at last, sighing.

 

The taller one shrugged, his hands in his jeans pockets.

 

-Okay, all right. I will talk for the both of us then. Let's see...- the warlock said, clapping his hands just one time before continue. -Oh, I'm sorry for the unexpected, Magnus. Something came up at the Institute, they did need me- he began to say teasing the other one. -Oh, don't worry Alec, it's fine, I forgive you. I'm a very merciful person-

 

-Excuse me?- Alec blurted stopping in the middle of the street. - _You_ forgive _me_?-

 

-Yes. That's what I said-

 

Alec chuckled moving out of the street, shaking his head.

 

-What?- the worlock asked frowning, following the Shadowhunter.

 

-You were flirting with a woman! And _you_ forgive _me_?- Alec's voice was incredulous, a sparkle of irritation in his eyes.

 

-I wasn't flirting, Alexander. We were just talking.- Magnus sighed rolling his eyes up. -What did you expect me to do? Staring the door waiting you to come back?-

 

-Yeah, sure. Tell the girl you weren't flirting. I'm quite sure she doesn't know-

 

Alec crossed his arms looking away. Magnus had the incredible power to make him feel stupid most of the time. He felt like a child when it was about him. Actually he really was a child compared to Magnus but he tried to not think about it. He knew the warlock was old, he knew that they lived their lives in different ways, but he couldn't stand how, sometimes, Magnus behaved with other people.

 

Magnus, on the other hand, did adore when Alec was jealous. It was a beautiful feeling. He had loved a lot of people during the centuries and a lot of people had loved him. But just a bunch of them made him feel precious like Alec did.

 

The warlock took a step forward and found Alec's waists with his hands, pulling him against himself, softly. -I _love_ when you're jealous, Alexander- he whispered, smiling. His eyes shone full of honesty while a gentle breeze blew on them.

 

Alec swollowed silently feeling the warmth of his presence against his own body. He couldn't think when Magnus was touching him like that. He felt his cheeks getting hotter, his blood boil in his veins. His eyes met Magnus' and for a moment Alec forgot for what reason he was so angry a second earlier. He held his hands on the warlock's face, his thumbs were caressing his cheeks, slowly. -I don't.- he said in a low voice, shyly. -It hurts.-

 

Magnus' lips parted while those words were reaching his heart. He wasn't used to Alec's frankness yet and sometimes his words left him speachless. It was as if Alec's thoughts had no filters and everything he was thinking just came out of his mouth. It was adorable and disarming at the same time.

 

-Sometimes I wonder if you are not aware of yourself. People like you and you don't know which effect your smile can have on them.- Alec said, sadly, biting his low lip. -That girl was into you, it was so obvious...- he sighed lowering his head.

 

It was painful to admit how much scared he was to lose Magnus. He didn't doubt about his feelings for him, he knew Magnus cared about him but... he also knew that he wasn't the first. Or the second. Or the third. He was the last of a long list of people he had cared about and even if he was sure he would have never done anything to hurt him, it was painful to see other people looking at him. Guys and girls who looked at Magnus with interest, with desire. He was so beautiful and bright and brilliant and wise... He had the charm of age and the beauty of a young man.

 

Magnus felt a soft twinge at his heart hearing those words. His glance got sweeter and his smile more tender. He stretched out his right arm towards his face, touching his cheek with his fingers. His thumb caressed his cheekbone softly while his heart began racing.

 

-Oh, Alexander- he cutely giggled. -She might has been into me, but I totally wasn't.- he smiled looking into his eyes, trying to show him how much honest he was. -You said that people like me but... Do you think people don't like _you_?- Magnus asked, softly.

 

Alec looked at him hesitating, confused by his words. -Er- he murmured, shyly.

 

The warlock chuckled for a brief moment. -You are really not aware of how people look at you, are you?- Magnus left his hand slip from his cheek to his chest, slowly, touching his skin and his shirt with his fingertops. -You are handsome and tall and lean. And you're loyal and gentle and honest. People _do_ like you. And I hate when they do. And I'm happy at the same time.-

 

-What?-

 

-I hate when they look at you as I do. I don't want them to see what I see in you. I want you to be mine and mine alone. I've always been quite jealous of my properties.- he admitted with warm voice. -Not that you are a “property”, of course. You know what I mean- he giggled smiling at him.

 

Alec smiled nodding a bit.

 

-But at the same time I'm happy that they can see what I see. You've always thought so bad about yourself. You've never seen all the good qualities you have. You just hidden behind Jace without wanting nothing more than be his shadow. But you are not a shadow, Alec. You're the most wonderful person I've known in years. Many years.- Magnus pointed out that last sentence winking at him. -And I want people to know that. I want everyone to know how amazing you are.- His voice was like a caress. The Shadowhunter felt his heart bumping, a sweet warmth spreading throughout his whole body while Magnus' hands stopped on his chest. His skin was burning there where his fingers were. But it didn't hurt, not at all. It was like an internal flame, as if he could light him up just by touching him.

 

Alec felt his mouth dry, the world vanising around them and Magnus' hands the only real thing in his life.

 

-I don't care what people see in me. I only care about what _you_ see- he whispered caressing his cheek with his thumb. -You're the only one I want to be seen-

 

Alec bowed his face to meet Magnus's. He could feel his hair touching his skin, his nose against his, and their lips pressed together. It was like breathe again. He couldn't describe how he felt everytime they kissed; it was something sweet and warm and urgent and precious. There were passion and romanticism at the same time. It always started with a soft touch of their lips and then they wanted more. Much more. Alec's right hand ran behind his head, touching his hair, while the other one ran down Magnus' chest to stop on his waist. The warlock gasped while his hand was slipping under Alec's shirt. His fingers brushed his chest, he could feel under the skin his heart racing. It was the most beautiful sensation he had ever felt.

 

Magnus parted Alec's lips and touched them with his tongue; a shiver ran up the Shadowhunter's back while a little moan came out of his mouth. More. They wanted more.

 

-Okay, wait...- Alec voice was heavy, low and gasping. Leave Magnus' lips was the most difficult thing he had ever done. His heart was hammering in his chest and his blood was burning throughout his body. The night breeze was cold against his hot skin and made him shiver. He tried to calm down biting his lower lip, putting his hands on the warlock's shoulders. -Maybe we should...- he began to say before stop.

 

Magnus looked at him, confused. -...should...?-

 

But Alec didn't hear him. He was looking at something behind the downworlder. Magnus noticed that and he just turned around a bit disappointed.

 

Raphael was talking to a crying Isabelle and now everything was clear. Few things could distract Alec from their kisses and his younger sister was one of them. Magnus internally sighed: their night was officially over. He saw Alec's glance and immediatly he rushed to grab his wrist. -Stay here, Alec.- he said.

 

The Shadowhunter looked at him frowning, not convinced at all.

 

-Isabelle is not fine-

 

-I can see that. But it's not up to us what it's happening between them-

 

-I'm going to kill him-

 

-Woah, calm down, little angel- Magnus smiled, softened by Alec's fraternal affection. -One: I don't think that killing him could be feel Isabelle better. Two: I've known him from a very long time and I can tell you he would never hurt people just for fun. Three: he's already going.-

 

Raphael turned back and began walking away from the Shadowhunter, followed by the killer glance of her brother.

 

Magnus sighed and left Alec's wrist to put a hand on his own hair. -Go to her. I will go after Raphael and I'll try to understand what's going on.- he said, quietly, looking at him. -I suppose they both need someone on their side tonight.-

 

Alec nodded staring at his sister silently crying in the middle of the street. He bowed toward Magnus' face and kissed him fast and sweet, like a kind way to thank him without words. -Goodnight then, Magnus- he said with a low voice, shy, sorry about the end of that night. -Next time it will be just the two of us. I promise-

 

Magnus smiled looking at him. -Go Shadowhunter, go.- he simply said, chilled, while Alec was already running toward Isabelle. He knew that unexpecteds like that there would have always been but he wasn't sad. He loved Alec even for that. The way he costantly put other people needs in front of his made Magnus wanted to put Alec's in front of his own. Alec would have been his priority even if he wasn't his. This would have been his way to love him.

 

Magnus breathed in and then he moved. He ran after Raphael, ready to start a long new day.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you did enjoy this chapter!   
> This is my first time writing about Malec and I've tried to be as faithful as possible to their personalities.  
> I don't know if I succeded, surely I could do better, but I still hope I've written something decent!
> 
> If you did enjoy it, please, leave a comment and let me know what you think about it!  
> If you have any corrections to do, please, do it freely! It will help me improve ^_^


End file.
